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[26 Feb 2004|11:04pm] [ mood | Stoned ] [ music | sOiL ] today was pretty fucked up. first i got suspended from college, then at band practice later on, i recored an awsome track of just me freestyling on my guitar, then got stoned to listen to it, its sooooo badass. hmm, anyway thats my day... i probably wont update again for a while cus i'm a lazy twat. adios. piss

[05 Feb 2004|01:21am] [ mood | YEEEEHAWWWWWW!!!! ] [ music | Chimaira ] not much to say really, yesterday and today after college i met up with an old friend from high school (it's becoming a regular thing now) and got drunk. didn't know he was so easy to get drunk though, i drink about half a litre more than him and he's drunk for way longer than i am. anyway, today, i went to college, and actually got there on time because for once, the stupid bus was on time. i got into my first lesson and didn't know what the hell was going on when it was me that was answering all the questions that the teacher asked... and i've missed the majority of his lessons too. really weird. anyway, i got a good comment on my contract thingy that i have to get signed at the end of each lesson to say i've actually been, which was really shocking... me... good comment... off dan... woah. anyway, went to my second lesson and there wasn't really much to do apart from edit a video and laugh my ass off at the interview with a "scally", cus Will really pissed him off by constantly saying rock was better than hardcore. Russel brought Pantera - Vulgar Display Of Power into the lesson to listen to, so i spent about half an hour in the main class room sat on a table headbanging. Then at the end of the lesson John, my teacher, was signing my contract and signed fridays lesson, instead of the one that said WEDNESDAY!!!! so when i pointed it out to him, he look confused, then figured it out, signed wednesdays lesson, and then said i don't need to show up for fridays lesson. i'm not sure if he was joking or not, but i'm going anyway, i'm gonna take a Chimaira album in to show anna what REAL music is. umm, didn't smoke any weed today (yeah i know, i'm "wowwww"ing too). I went up to see Jodie today too, her front gates nearly killed alien. they shut on him. poor bastard. then harry spat in my eye, so i'm gonna get him back eventually and flick the cherry from a joint in his eye or spit vodka in his eyes. ok, i now think this is one of my longest enteries ever, therefore i cannot be bothered writing anymore because i've realised i'm making myself seem like a total geek. so, take it easy ppl. adios. 1 pissed :: piss

[01 Feb 2004|01:40am] [ mood | calm ] [ music | silence ] hmm, well, what to say. i've been up to the usual thing today. smoking weed, well, not all day, i was waiting in the rain for most of the day for someone to drop weed off. umm, sorted some of the songs out that i've written with my band this morning, they needed changing at the beginnings so they sounded a little heavier. hmm, tomorrow i'm gonna smoke weed with haz n dan, then the guy who everyone loves to hate is coming up to do our college photography assignment with me. not really looking forward to it but it's gotta be done. dunno what i'm gonna do after that, he'll probably be bringing his guitar down here so i'll have to sit in teaching him how to pluck a string. fuck. anyway, i'm gonna go get food n go to bed. take it easy ppl. 1 pissed :: piss

[29 Jan 2004|12:30am] [ mood | enthusiastic ] [ music | silence ] had a band practice today, was really awsome. came up with quite a few songs and ideas for future practices. the bassist (paul) seems more enthusiastic lately, but that's only when the vocalist isn't around. which confuses me. he has said that he thinks our vocalist is shit, so he probably doesnt want to work around someone he thinks he's not gonna get anywhere with. which is fine by me, if we're workin good together without the vocalist i think it should stay like that. chris was comin up with beats a lot better too. hmm, i'm happy now, for once. ah well, think i'll be off. adios. piss

[18 Jan 2004|12:49am] [ mood | tired ] [ music | Unit 36 ] k, i have nothing to write about in this, so i'm gonna write about caz. caz is reallyyyy hot, n she always denying it, she musn't look in the mirror much. umm, guitar is calling. adios. piss

[14 Jan 2004|01:08am] [ mood | creative ] [ music | AC/DC ] hmm, k, i've not updated in umm, well, fuckin ages. do i have a reason? yes. i've been umm, i dunno, the only way i can describe it is broken up mentally... so i've been fixing that with cannabis. woohoo. anyway. umm, i'll start updating again now... i think. i'm not gonna fill you in on what you've all missed cus all i'd need to say is "REEFERSSSSSSS". anyway, i'm gonna go eat now. adios. piss

[23 Dec 2003|12:54pm] i can't remember what the hell i was gonna do today, but i got new plans now anyway. matty's coming up with money so he can get drunk... n im stayin sober, cus drunkness is boring. been drunk too many times. hmm, hope i can get some weed today, i didnt have any yesterday, n it didnt feel right, i normally have it every day. blah, i got really stressed last nite, n had a go at a girl i've known for bout a year and never argued with or nethin. felt good to yell at her. dunno why, maybe its just been building up inside me from all the times she's said something thats made me wanna go mental. hmm, thats bout it from me. here's tom with the weather. 1 pissed :: piss

[22 Dec 2003|05:45pm] i guess i was right about life. every time it gets good, something fucks it up. i thought i was over lisa, n then i started thinking about her all the time again. and, i feel like a mean bastard, cus someone at college has just dumped their bf cus she likes me, even tho i told her i dnt want a gf or nethin. my mum is naggin my constantly STILL but it's getting worse, the first thing she says to me in the day is a complaint, or when she comes in, she starts complaining about a mess in the house that was there when she left, and is actually her mess. she thinks im just someone she can blame for everything so she doesnt look bad. i dont think she realises how much i hate life, and if she did, i dont think she'd stop nagging me to make it better, i think she'd do it more. i cant be bothered writing any more now. piss

[19 Dec 2003|07:57pm] [ mood | tired ] [ music | rob zombie ] listen to the reason. in the black room where i started. machine head tomorrow... yay. hmm, went to college today, got stoned, then went to manchester with danny n he got a bong. thennn i came home and ate loads. now im bored. from the beginning to the end what do you want? do you pretend? 1 pissed :: piss

[15 Dec 2003|08:36pm] [ mood | lonely ] [ music | transmission ] i don't want to be the one that tells you. went for a walk before, wanted some time alone to think. i could only think about one thing though, well, not a thing, a person. don't know why i cant stop thinking about her. i really want her back but i know i cant have her. hmm, i got nothin else to say now. adios. this is gonna be the one that kills you. 1 pissed :: piss

[14 Dec 2003|02:29pm] [ mood | hungry ] [ music | velvet acid christ ] hold up these words so holy and pure. confused again yeah so absurd. i went to college today but couldn't do anything cus they guy i'm working with in both of the lessons i had to day is off with flu. dammit. meh, i'm not complaining, i got out of lessons cus of it. hmm, neway, went to the pub cus i couldn't do anything in lessons, n had a beer then went to the snooker club thing n watched some m8s play pool while i sat with rachel falling asleep on me. guh, i've smoked like a chimney today, i need to quit smoking. hmm. anyway, im home now, and im bored n hungry and want more beer. gonna have to get me a job so i can spend all day in the pub. oh, i saw a bitch on the bus today who was the person that started all the lies that caused me n lisa to split up. a while ago she said her and her bf are gonna beat me up, so i asked her when her and her bf are gonna beat me up, and she went all quiet n looked scared shitless n said in a little scared voice "i dont need my bf to help" lol. she takes TOO many drugs. heh, if she pisses me off enough i think i might just tell the police where she lives and how much she uses drugs. she's fucked then. stupid little whore. heh, tis funny watchin her face when she sees me, she looks like she's gonna shit her pants. bet she thinks i'm a woman beater n im gonna beat the shit out of her or summat. the retard. neway... umm, nothin else to say now, so i'll go do somethin so i got somethin else to write about. adios. you fall down in the pit of fire, you ripped it off you fucking liar. 1 pissed :: piss

[14 Dec 2003|01:25am] [ mood | confused ] [ music | spineshank ] sick distorted colors that stab into your skin. the fluctuating light that comes from with in. umm, im bored, can't sleep, too much on the mind. hmm, i don't see the point in going into college tomorrow because for the 2 classes i have, i have to work with will, and he's not in this week cus of flu. so i'm fucked, i can't do any work. oh well. i'll go in and see if i can just go. or maybe i could do some of my photography work on my own. hmm, nah, it's a bit impossible. neway, im going.. adios. acid on the tongue goes straight through your brain. falling on the floor as you wince in pain. piss

[13 Dec 2003|08:30pm] [ mood | gloomy ] [ music | alkaline trio ] imperfect cry, and scream in ecstasy, so what befalls the flawless? hmm, went college today for the pointless 1 lesson. then went to the pub after college with dave n danny, then shaun n ppl came up n dave was all pissed off cus he hates shauns guts. was funny watchin him try to hold back his anger in the corner. too many people hate shaun, i dnt see why though, he hasn't done anythin, he's just a bit weird. but that doesnt make sense cus im probably the weirdest person in the whole college and i have TOO many friends. meh. my hand hurts from all this typing. if u don't know whats up with it, i broke 3 knuckles and my wrist. neway, i'm off now. adios. look what I've built, it shines so beautifully, now watch as it destroys me. piss

[12 Dec 2003|10:33pm] [ mood | FUCK YOU! ] [ music | it doesnt fucking matter! ] i'm fed up of always being the one in the wrong. i'm not always doing wrong. i'm not sorry. i don't need to be sorry. i know way too many people that try to make me sorry for things i haven't done. so here's a quick message to all those people. YOU'VE GOT ME AS FAR AS WANTING TO KILL MYSELF, BUT YOU'RE NOT BRINGING ME DOWN ANY FURTHER. FUCK YOU! piss

[12 Dec 2003|04:04am] [ mood | crappy ] [ music | tool ] seems like i've been here before. seems so familiar. i can't sleep. i've been lying in bed thinking, and i've only just realised that im a complete fuck up. that's fucking great, i finally shake off one thing that makes me want to commit suicide, then i find another thing, and i don't think this one will shake off. oh well. i'm going to try and sleep again, got to be up in about 3 hours. au revoir. seems like i'm slipping into a dream within a dream. piss

[12 Dec 2003|12:02am] [ mood | crazy ] [ music | rob zombie ] creature core you can't ignore, i got a 5000 fingers of dead yeah. went for a walk up to alisons today. didnt realise how fookin far it actually is. meh, not bothered tho, i need to do more exercise, my legs are becoming retarded. hmm. not really done anythin apart from the walk today. there's fuck all to do on tuesdays apart from play guitar n stare at my computer. meh, gonna go now. au revoir. a rats are we you can't break free, you're with the livin' on your bed yeah. piss

[09 Dec 2003|04:17pm] [ mood | stoned ] [ music | rob zombie ] hell on earth, for what it's worth, dead on dreaming, you started screaming hmm, haven't done much this weekend, just got stoned loads. dunno what else to write so im gonna go play guitar. adios. the wizard of how, the king of the now, cry like a banshee, and die like you want me. piss

[11 Nov 2003|10:57pm] [ mood | creative ] [ music | fear factory ] one step closer, one step closer to my fate. 2 weeks before my bands first gig, my bassist and i have quit the band... the reason behind this is... wait, no, i wont say it. anyway, i have a new band forming now, think it's already formed, just need to know if the bassist chris knows wants to be in it. hmm.. my life is a bit of a mess lately, its getting better though, the main reason its a mess is because of a certain somone who said a while ago she trusts me, but obviously doesnt. hmm, theres too much to say about what's been going on in my life lately, so i won't bore you, i'll go play guitar or something. i'll be creative with my feelings. au revoir. one step closer, one step closer to the grave. piss

[10 Nov 2003|03:12am] [ mood | crushed ] [ music | tool ] Dreaming of that face again. It's bright and blue and shimmering. Grinning wide and comforting me with it's three warm and wild eyes. Today young men on acid realized that all matter is merely energy condensed to a slow vibration, that we are all one conciousness experiencing itself subjectively, there is no such thing as death, life is only dream, and we're the imagination of ourselves. Here's Tom with the weather. On my back and tumbling down that hole and back again rising up and wiping the webs and the dew from my withered eye. piss

[06 Nov 2003|12:31pm] [ mood | stoned ] [ music | pantera ] I'll start this off without any words, I got so high that I scratched 'till I bled. hmmm, hello, not made an entery on here in a couple of days... well, im over all my shit now, still have the problems but im not bothered bout them. hmmm, goin now, stoned, need food. I love myself better than you, I know it's wrong so what should I do? piss

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